Monday, September 29, 2014

Letting Go, The Ultimate Proof of Love / Tree of Life

They say true friends can usually be counted with the fingers of one hand and you still have fingers left. It's true in my case. Very few I consider  true friends. They know me and all that I am. They know my flaws and accept them. They see my virtues and value them. If I call for them, they answer. If they call for me, I am there for them.

Even fewer have known me long enough to have experienced my dragon fire upon them and stayed my friends. And only one of them knows all of my secrets, the good and the bad. Only one knows most of my soul and has seen the dark and the light side, but has never feared me. This one friend is leaving town soon.

Our friendship is unique. We are as different as night and day, as fire and water. When first I met her, I tried to stay away from her. She was too cheerful, charismatic and popular for my tastes. I don't like popular people. We still laugh at the fact she never read my evasive behavior as "stay away" signals. On the contrary, the more I tried to dodge her, the more she hang out with me. I just looked at her like an odd person. Why in hell anyone would want to be with a rather bitter looking anti-social dragon? To make it worst, she is a kind of hug-maniac. She is always hugging everyone.

Not only that. We don't like the same music. She can party all night long, I want my bed by 10.00 pm. She's not quite the reader, I love books. She's not a fantasy fan. I'm a creature of fantasy. She can make friends with a light post, I find it hard to keep a 1 minute conversation with a stranger.

We do share some traits, though. Strong temper: She's the tiger, I'm the
dragon. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon when we fought.  Empathy, I often know what she needs without her telling me and she knows what I need without me telling her. We've got to be so close, we could feel each other's feelings, like twins. Either could feel sad without knowing why, and then discover it was the other one's sadness, or stress, or anger. We could call each other out of the blue and discover the timing was perfect, for we were sorely needed. We could summon each other with the mere thought and get an answer within the hour.

My best friend and I, we've cried together, we've kicked each other's butt out of our space and called Time Out; we've fallen and got up again. We've encouraged each other, we've scowled at each other. We've lost, we've won, we've learned and we've fought side by side. We have shared our deepest secrets and fears and hopes and pains to one another. She has taught me to see the world through her eyes and I've taught her to see it through mine, without ever losing our own particular essence. In my 803 years of life, I've never had a friend like this one. Ever.

When she said she was leaving town in search of her destiny, my heart dropped to my feet. Yet, my answer was "Yes! If that's where your peace is, then go get it, girl! Don't hesitate. Don't look back. Grab your stuff and go after your happiness. It's time to fly and there are awesome things awaiting for you! This is your chance. You can do this. Go. Fight. Win!"

In the last days, I've been helping her in everything I can for her moving. I've bought some of her furniture. I've taken things I need and things I don't need, just because I want to have mementos of my friend. I won't lie. I have a sense of abandoned dragon somewhere deep. It will likely surface at full once her flight takes off and she leaves Mexico City, friends and family behind. Tears have choked me a couple times but I've managed to swallow them down. I know she's not happy here. I know it is very possible she'll find her true happiness where she's heading. She'll prosper and find her place and herself in the way. And I am very happy for that, because she's my best friend in this life, and I believe, she was my best friend in past lives. That's the only explanation of how our friendship developed so strong and so indestructible in such opposite creatures.

I've never been good to let go. I've clung to some people, some things and every memory in an almost obsessed manner. This is the first time I'm letting go with such level of true understanding, significant amounts of wisdom and real joy for the other person. I'll miss my friend. I'll miss her so much my heart is already crying for the chunk that is being tore off it. But I know even when I will no longer have her at 15 minute drive from my cave, our friendship is strong enough to overcome distance. It's all matter to switch on the telepathy again... or so I want to believe.

In a way, we will always stay with one another. I am convinced our friendship comes from a previous life and will last this lifetime and all the following.

Cover design by artist and composer, Ryo Ishido

This anthology is dedicated in memory of Tina Downey, our dearest friend, fellow storyteller and firm believer that life is good…

Welcome to audiomachine‘s Tree of Life: Branching Out, a cross-industry collaborative writing project featuring 26 authors from across the globe whose collective story is inspired by motion picture advertising music production house, audiomachine’s Tree of Life album.

During the course of 26 consecutive days, each writer contributed a chapter within 24 hours of the previous installment, spinning the tale in whatever direction they chose, resulting in the ultimate collaborative journey of words and music.

The anthology includes a new epilogue, a memorial story I wrote for “T”, entitled, Epitaph.

Here it is the Amazon Link.  All proceeds of the TREE OF LIFE ebook will benefit the Downey Education Fund set up for Tina’s children.

It was my honor to be part of this amazing adventure. Thank you, Sam, for all of your efforts in putting this together.

Dragon Hugs to all!


  1. She might not be right there, but keep in contact and she'll always be with you. (Keep working on her about the fantasy as well.)
    Very excited Tree of Life is finally available!

  2. Alex is right, friendships can last forever even if you don't see one another. Hard to lose a friend to distance, but you can keep in touch so easily these days.

    I do hope the Tree of Life will sell lots to help Tina's kids.

  3. Encourage your friend to pursue her dreams even though it hurts to let her go. She'll always be in your heart.

  4. My best friend and I had to part ways years ago. She's in CA and I'm in NJ. We live 3000 miles away from one another. It hasn't made one bit of difference, she is still the first person I call. The first person who can make me laugh and cry. And just about the only person who can still call me on my bullshit and get away with it. LOL. Honestly, our absence of physcial proximity never lessened our bond. But I feel your pain. I only want what is best for her, and it's not living on the East Coast by me. That's how you know you truly love someone, right? You want what's best for them, no matter what it costs you. Big Hugs to you today. My heart goes out to you.

  5. It's so sad to see a good friend move on to different things. But I've always found that as life moves on and things disappear, it often also provides what you need in a new way. I believe you'll find someone new to share things with and count on. I'm crossing my fingers for you!

  6. Hi Al - you'll keep that friendship alive .. and you're doing so much for your friend - she will be happy with that - and as you say hopefully she'll be happier where she ends up ...

    It's great the anthology for Tina ... I've bought and it was whisked off to my Kindle and my ipad .. so now I shall open it up and read ... it's brilliant all the proceeds are going to the Downey family ...

    Cheers Hilary

  7. You are a wise dragon for letting go, though distance in this time is something technology allows us to conquer in various ways (skype, etc.). And thanks for sharing about the Tree of Life anthology.

  8. When you have a true best friend it doesn't matter where they're located they remain your best friend. You and she will miss the 15 minute drive from each other but you'll have many talkfests and it will be as if there was no miles between you. I'm glad it happens that way because me and my best friend who knows the good bad and even the really ugly about me is miles away.

    You're a good friend because you want to see her happy and you're cheering her on, even tho it hurts.

    Big hugs to the Dragon today. He needs them.

    Ps I'm a big hugger too. So if ever I meet you, be prepared, lol!

    Sia McKye Over Coffee

  9. Oh my dear friend, I can feel your loss, and your joy, for and about your friend. I too, have very few and cherish those I have. Thank you for sharing this with us because I think it speaks to a feeling we have all had, either wanting to have a friend like this, or having/had one. We can relate. She will treasure your feelings for her because it has been, and still is, a mutual feeling. I hope you know that will help her on her quest, her new journey, and that she's taking a BIG part of you with her.

    I just bought the Tree of Life book today. Looking forward to reading it.... Have a good one FD...

  10. I rarely see my best friend these days. I think it has been a couple of years now. We don't often talk even, because life gets in the way. And when we do, the connection is immediate. And she is always in my heart as your friend is in yours. And you in hers.

  11. Parting is a rough time. That is what makes social media a blessing. It allows us to stay connected, even when face to face time is impossible. I hope your friend finds joy, and this parting turns into an opportunity for even more deep friendships.

  12. I do believe true friends can survive distance. There's Skype, email, phones and of course telepathy, I'm sure you will be able to share and follow in her adventures to come.

  13. Big hugs to you. I completely empathize. I've had few really good friends in life, and it hurt every single time to leave. You're an amazing friend encouraging and supporting her no matter how much it saddens you.

  14. Hi, FD...

    I have moved around so much and left so many close friends behind, BUT rest assured, my true friends are still in my life. Distance will never break a true bond. Especially in today's world we can communicate so easily. LOOK at all of us. WE SPAN THE GLOBE. We are here for each other. Most of us never met or will ever meet, BUT we are kindred spirits. We have know one another in previous lives. The connection will always be...

    Hugs, Al.

  15. You are truly a great friend to support her while your heart breaks. You've been very blessed to know her and she you. You'll still be able to stay in touch and who knows, maybe she'll return after she's explored the world a bit. Hugs to you!