Monday, May 12, 2014

Interested in a Goal Partner? / Come Back Release Day


The Art of War says a good general knows how to make the best use of everyone according to their abilities and nature. Extremely brave men are good for attack but they are weak on prudence. Cowards might not be bold but they are excellent in matters of caution. Introspective persons are good thinkers, gossipers are perfect to misguide the enemy about the general's true plan. In other words, he who knows the art of war knows that there are no flawed people, if he has vision enough to put their characteristics (good or bad) to a good use. In the wrong place, everyone is flawed. In the right place, everyone might be a blessing.

I've been pondering deeply on many of the comments in my previous post. I came up with an idea. I have goals. I am terrible with schedules and goal plans. It is very difficult for me to do things if I am the only one who cares those things get done. At some point I find myself thinking, what's the point? No one is waiting for this. No one cares if I do it or I don't. It's just for me so I can do it today, or tomorrow or next year. And that's how the pile of unfinished projects came to be. There are books, sculptures, paintings, drawings, puzzles, 3D origami, and many other projects in that pile.

I also have the strongest proclivity to procrastination. The Artist's Way claims procrastination comes from a deep inner fear to try and fail. I would rather do something else than face the challenge before me and confirm my fear that I'm not good at this. It's worse when we procrastinate with things that give us a good alibi, like home chores, next year homework, a needed repair, the old lady that needs help to cross the street (and since it is a good deed) why not walk her to her home and clean her fridge?

Last month I had revelation. I am capable of doing amazing progress on my goals if I get to feel someone, anyone, truly cares and is waiting for my results. It was an incentive I usually miss. The factor between just do it! and let's rather learn how to make blackberry jelly! I think NaNoWriMo is a great chance to get some writing done because there is the incentive that many writers keep tabs with each other's progress. There is mutual support. I can see the difference between sharing achievements and cheering with others and struggling with the blank page on your own.

In my previous post I expressed my wish to help people like I used to do. I also have goals to achieve and I have the need for someone willing to share with a dragon, despite the fire breathing and the dragon's breath. A friend of old time belonged to a group where they shared their goals. They had deadlines and different goals and interests, but they were all committed to support each other. If someone had to wake up at 5am in order to reach his goal, everyone would send him a message at 4.50am. If someone had an important meeting any certain day, everyone would send her a short good luck message. If anyone was about to give up, everyone would remind him why it was worthy what he was doing. Although I smoked her out of secret jealousy, I was thrilled to see her achieve amazing things thanks to this group.

I am wondering if anyone would be interested in trying something like this with me? Is there anyone in need of a dragon goal partner? If you're looking for Rainbow Bright sweetness, I am the wrong choice. However, if what you need is an honest dragon who cares for you to make your best to reach your goals; who won't set your butt on fire if you stop walking forwards (only your pants for sure), I'm the dragon you're looking for. I might bite your heels when you get lazy but you are also entitled to hide the virgin snack jar or throw a dwarf at my head if I get behind. You'll have the whole Dwarf Cheering Squad at your service for when you feel sad or you need courage. We will cry with you, if you feel like it, but right after we'll shake the vultures off your head and kick you back to your feet. All Father Dragon expects is just the same he offers. No more, no less. I'm a dragon of honor.

Are you one of those who find it's easier getting things and goals done when in group? Do you need someone to share your dreams with, as crazy or silly they might seem? Are you fearless to dwarf hair balls and fire breath? Would you like to support a dragon's dream? +001 DRAGONBITES. Call now! A dwarf will be happy to talk to you.

Seriously though, if you would like to try, drop me a note. You can find my email address here. Dragon Hugs!

PS. NOT limited to writers. Valid for any goal, be it artistic, personal, professional, writerly... You just have to have a goal!


It's release day for Melissa Maygrove's debut novel!

Sometimes a single choice 
alters the course of a person's life 
forever.



Come Back
by Melissa Maygrove
Western Historical Romance
Adult / New Adult
Available May 12th from Truelove Press


Where to find Melissa...

Where to find her book...

Don't forget to add it to your Goodreads.
Cover designed by Carrie Butler,


88 comments:

  1. Congratulations, Melissa!
    I'm one of those writers who needs NaNo to complete a project. Otherwise, I take months to write, like I have been this whole year with my current manuscript. I just might need a dragon kick in the butt to finish!

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    1. Thanks, Alex.
      Have boots, will kick. :P

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    2. Drop me a note! I'll be more than glad to have you as a goal partner.

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  2. Hi, FD...

    How encouraging and wonderful you are. Giving of yourself once more. Knowing you have a situation and finally have found the way to meet your goals head on, like the true dragon you are....

    I'll always be in your corner because I believe you are a TRUE artist. A renaissance dragon. Over the time you have blogged I have seen your excellence in art in so many different areas. In that sense we are kindred spirits...

    I will be cheering for you. Always.

    I'll write you soon...

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    1. I am always happy to hear from you and it would be my pleasure if you decide on having a dragon goal partner. I'm here for you anytime.

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    2. Thanks, FD,

      I know you are.... likewise!

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  3. OH.... And CONGRATS MELISSA! ALL THE BEST with your release!!!!!!!

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  4. What an awesome post, my beloved dragon, and I'm referring to the top portion. LOL I'd love to join your group, but I'm not sure I could keep up. I've promised myself to take a break and focus on my family this summer. If it's something I can jump into come fall, then maybe so. And you know you can always bend my ear if you're feeling low.

    Thank you for announcing my new release. :)

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    1. No problem, Melissa. I won't set your deadlines or anybody else's. It's meant for each to determine what she/he wants to do and the time to do it. I'll just remind you of what your plan is. :) Anytime you wish for a goal partner, I'm up for it. Thanks for your kind offer. And best luck with your book!!!

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  5. Sounds like a great idea, as shoulders can be at a premium. I'm not in the market for your assistance at this time, but I had a few friends through the years who needed motivators. Happy flying, Dragon.

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    1. Thanks, D.G. Happy journey for you too. Dragon Hugs.

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  6. Your heart is bigger than the sky.

    And congratulations to Melissa. Big, big congratulations.

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    1. There are other worlds to sing in, right? I'm trying to find a suitable one. I thank you so very much for that little story. It was a blessing and filled my heart with hope. Dragon Hugs!

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  7. Woot! Melissa is all over the blogospere! Congrats. :)
    I'm kind of the opposite - I think the word "stubborn" comes to mind. If I have a set goal or schedule, I dig my heels in and fail at it. NaNo makes me sweat bullets and develop migraines yet if left to my own devices, I easily write that much and more. I was a terrible teenager too...
    What I do know I'm good at is cheerleading other people and giving hugs - even extra big ones to certain dragons! Actually, you can see this in my comments. Lots of ! and :) Think drill sergeant with pom-poms (can substitute dwarf for pom-poms).

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    1. Thank you! :D

      I can be that way, too, River. Then I set a goal of a publication date...and made it public. *gulp* That forced me to make my deadlines. When you've paid for graphics with the release date on them, you kinda have to move forward. LOL

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    2. You are an amazing person. The more challenging your life is, the more productive you become. Seems creativity just pours out of you. I'm not surprised you work just fine on your own. I must thank you for taking the time to extra cheer the dragon. I think I can send the dwarves for a cheering seminar with you. ;) Dragon Hugs!

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    3. Please outfit the dwarves with protective gear. And oxygen tanks in case they fall in the pool when tossed. I'm not like Jeff. I won't feed them any beans while they're here.

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  8. Grats Melissa! You're blowing up my phone!

    I do better at accomplishing things with deadlines and pressure, but I wouldn't say I'm happier or more satisfied by having accomplished them. Two young children keep me occupied, and at this time in my life, that's more pressure than I need. But maybe in a couple years, things will be settled and the pressure will be good for me.

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    1. Don't feel bad, Loni. I could not have done this during that season of my life. I think you're superwoman for managing to publish with little ones! :)

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    2. I would say it is not just matter to get things done on a given time. It's important to choose worthy goals that make a difference in our lives so we can feel the satisfaction or joy of achieving them. Now children always encompass worthy goals in themselves and also bring happiness and satisfaction.

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  9. Accountability partners. I like it. I think it is wonderful of you to throw this out there. I think most people need a kick in the behind occasionally.

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    1. I do. I certainly do. Drahon Hugs!

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  10. Way to go Melissa.

    How about my Spanish goals? As a Spanish speaker you could certainly kick my rear end.

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    1. That will work, Grandmother! I have signed you up.

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    2. At first, I thought she wrote 'Spanish goats'. LOL :P

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    3. I did something similar today, somebody was congratulating a blogger on her pretty stools - furniture.

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  11. Unlike a certain Jezebel, I will feed the dwarves all the beans they can handle and stuff them into the cave if that's what it takes to motivate the dragon. Seriously though, I think I'm starting to get to a place where choosing goals is becoming crucial. Biggest worry at this point is choosing the wrong goal(s). I'd rather fail striving for the right goal than succeed at goals that don't really matter. Is Sessin a good counselor? :)

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    1. Oh, and I'm super happy for Melissa. We're going to be telling people "I knew her when..."

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    2. "I'd rather fail striving for the right goal than succeed at goals that don't really matter."
      Very thought-provoking. And true.

      Thanks, Jeff. :)

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    3. Sessin? I am offering dragon kicks and you ask for a dwarf? Now who's the chicken? Hahaha. I've got you in my list now.

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  12. I want in!!! I'll take a dragon paw to the rear along with the hugs. I totally agree...I do better when I feel like I have to be accountable. And I have this cycle...work hard, build momentum, don't see immediate results, then get pooped out and quit. It's just the stupidest self-defeating sort of attitude. I'll email you with my plea. :)

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    1. "I have this cycle...work hard, build momentum, don't see immediate results, then get pooped out and quit."

      I'm guilty of this, too, sometimes. You're not the only one.

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    2. Yes, you're definitely not the only one! Lift-off for the hamster wheel. Oh, look! It broke off and rolled into the street. A big rig is aiming for it...

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    3. Ah! Elizabeth! You make me happy. We share a common issue. I love that. I have signed you up!

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  13. This is such a great offer you're making! I'd love to be a part of something like this. I'm not sure I'd be the best person though. I get migraines every few days so I'm not the most reliable person in the world. Dang it!!

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    1. I think you already have a good goal you could devote 10 minutes a day, Elsie. To reduce the frequency of your migraines. There is always a chance to make the quality of our life better. My offer remains open. :)

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  14. I want to, too, Elise. Very much! I'm just so deadlined- and tasked-out right now that I can't fathom taking on one more responsibility. Maybe after I've had some down time...

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    1. Well yes, there is a cheering responsability for sure, but think that you will also get a cheering encouraging support in return. ;) As I said, my offer remains open.

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    2. How would you set up this group? Email list...private Facebook group?
      I'll admit, you have me curious. ;)

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    3. You had me pondering. That's the good thing about deciding to do something you're totally new at. You have to figure everything out. Go me!
      The answer would be Email list private.

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  15. It's always easier to achieve goals in a crowd Al. Good advice! I called DRAGONBITES (372-466-24837) and the guy didn't sound very encouraging...

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    1. Hahaha, you really have me laughing here. I think the problem is that you missed the code for Mexico and then the code for the dragon cave. My mistake.

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  16. That's an awesome offer Father Dragon... an awesome offer!
    I'll have to think about it... my schedule is already overflowing... and I really don't like to commit to something, unless I'm sure I can give it 100% (I'm very hard on myself in this way... *sighs*)
    How would you structure this group?

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    1. Oh, I forgot - congratulations to Melissa!

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    2. I fully understand, Michelle. It took me four days to decide if I really wanted to try this and the possible time requirements. I think I'm starting with an email list sort of group. I first have to confirm how many are really doing it and we'll go from there. Commitment is very important and also one-to-one support. I am interested in developing strong bonds of caring and friendship more than quick growing in numbers.

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    3. No worries, Michelle. I think you've congratulated me about 20 times now. LOL

      You hit on another thing that tends to hold me back in these things--that I don't like to commit unless I can do a good job. Can TOTALLY relate.

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  17. I have to pass on the invitation, but I'm sure you'll find your share of people interested. I'll be dropping by again to see how it goes. :-)

    Anna from Shout with Emaginette

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    1. No problem, Anna. Thanks for visiting!

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  18. Yay for Melissa!

    I'm an amazing goal setter and distance runner. It's never been difficult for me to accomplish things because I know how to break it down and make something happen, but I completely get that's not the way it works for everyone. I'm hesitant to sign myself up for anything because my head is already exploding from all I've got going on, but I'm totally there for support. If/when you get this thing going, give me a shout.

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    1. Thanks for the cheer on my behalf, Crystal. :)

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    2. I am getting organized. I will drop you a note when we are ready to go. Thanks for the cheering support, Crystal. Dragon hugs!

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  19. Did NaNoWriMo last year and LOVED it. I can't wait to get back to the entire first draft I accomplished, but must finish current edits on book I want to throw at something right now, lol. I'd love to be a part of a Goal group and sent you an email...

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    1. Excellent, Lisa. I got it. You will hear from the dragon soon. Let's get many goals achieved. :) Dragon Hugs!

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  20. I was a member of a ftf writers group for about 3 years and got more writing done. I bet I'm a much bigger procrastinator than you, lol. this is truly a wonderful offering Sir.

    Congrats to Melissa. Awesome cover.

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    1. Whenever you need for a dragon push, drop me a note! Dragon hugs.

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  21. First, congratulations, Melissa. I've seen your cover all around this week and that's wonderful.

    FD, I'm really torn over your offer. Lord knows I could use the nagging...er, support. But I've been so far behind in everything lately, I'm afraid I wouldn't hold up my end and I'd hate that.

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    1. Honestly, I am so delayed as well. Just trying to energize my will, I guess. My offer stands, though.

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  22. I need to come by more often. Your art is amazing. Your words, uplifting. Looks like you have plenty of interest, or I'd join in. I need goal partners too. I think I may have what I need for now. Thank you for putting it out there.

    Also, I dropped by because I thought you might resonate with the poem I have posted.

    Be well.
    xoRobyn

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    1. If you need it, please join. The door is open and will stay open. Thanks for visiting and for your words. :) dragon hug.

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  23. First of all a huge congrats to Melissa! I've seen the cover reveal, I've seen other debut posts, etc. Her marketing is going well! Thanks for supporting others in this community.
    That said, I will definitely send you an email about the kick-in-the-rear-when-needed support group. I think we're going to need some initials...something catchy, but easy.
    Great idea, Father Dragon, and I thank you.
    Tina @ Life is Good
    On the Open Road! @ Join us for the 4th Annual Post-Challenge Road Trip!

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    1. Thank you, Tina. The writing community has been wonderful to me.

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    2. Initials, yes! Just make them easy to remember. I still need the I was seeking Gary trick with the IWSG. Welcome, Tina!

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  24. Congrats on your release, Melissa!

    This is an idea I can get behind, Sir Dragon. I've been pulling teeth (so to speak) with getting words down on paper lately. Maybe you can claw-poke me and I can sword-jab you through email? My presence online seems to have waned and my email usage has gone way up. :)

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    1. Dear Sir David, there is no better time than present time! I will be more than glad to poke you hahaha.

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  25. I think what you're asking for is basically what a CP group is, although in your case you may want artists instead of writers. You need to find like-minded people, at a skill level comparable to yours, who want to be in a group. (A group is better because people tend to come and go, or sometimes get too busy with real-life to participate, so it's good to have a bunch.) There were a number of artists in the A-Z...I think? I know Heather Holden of the Echo Effect is an artist. I'm hoping you look around on the net and find the group you need. That's what I did and it made SUCH a big difference! And congrats to Melissa!! :)

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    1. No, I want just people with goals, regardless the type of goal. I don't look for critique as much as support and friendship. I think it is better to form my own group so it fits the specific idea I've got in mind. Thanks for the suggestions, though. And thanks for visiting! Dragon hugs.

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  26. Aloha Al :)

    Sir Dragon Dude, I could *SO* have written much of your post... in fact I think "procrastination" is an anagram of my name (but I am going to put off finding out for now...)

    For example, I *know* writing gives me the most non-family thrill/buzz/feeling, but I get scared to do it, so I also look for other things that first "need" to be done!!!

    It's soooo annoying sometimes... especially when I only have several hours a day to do all my writing/tweeting/emailing/blogging.. and when my time is up and no new words are added to my WIP, I feel sad.

    Therefore, I'm in with the goal thing (if there is still some space:) I'll send you an email and I suppose we will go from there :)

    Have a great weekend and tell the dwarves to be careful... soon the season of the migrating Leprechauns will be on you as they head from Ireland to Brazil (in time for the World Cup :)

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    1. Sir Madman Dude! Dwarves and Dragon are more than happy to count you in the Fellowship of the Dragon. Sent you a mail too.

      And don't worry. Dwarves are too busy in rehearsals!

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  27. Al, I find sharing goals are a great motivator. I know in my writing group we do have writing months where we state a word goal, and we also share snippets of what we're working on through out the month and it's a great way to keep you honest. We have a goal keeper too that tracks what we do.

    We have quite a few published authors in group (we started the group with no published authors) and even a few best sellers. I find that even they have problems getting motivated. They'll fling down a gauntlet--1000 (or whatever they set) words sprint. Helps a lot. For one, it shows that regardless of where you are on the path each have problems.

    Procrastinate? Yes, I do. And I've read the Art of War (learned a quite a bit). It's true, sometimes its the fear of not failure, but it's the fear of success. You see, success brings it's own whip and the need to repeat what was done again and again.

    When my shoulder is up to sustained typing, I'll be glad to join in. I'll need the whip to get back into the groove of writing. :-)
    \
    Sia McKye Over Coffee

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    1. Anytime you wish, Sia, I will be glad to welcome you to the group. In the meantime take a good care of yourself. I send you lots of healing thoughts and dragon hugs!

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    2. I'm getting there. Time and persistence in improving the arm. Have a pretty good range of motion considering I'm not quite 2 months post op.

      Dragon hugs always make me feel better!

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  28. This sounds like an excellent idea. I've been on a kick recently after recent circumstances instilled the message that life is short, so I have been setting goals and making plans left, right and centre. In short, I'm motivated, but my only danger is that I will rush too much and then crash and burn, so I might need a reminder to slow down! I'll certainly bear your group in mind and I will help to promote it in any way I can. :)

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    1. I think I will post about this on Monday. You need to choose one or two critical goals, at the most, and focus on them. Otherwise you are up for an overwhelming burn-out. Think not of a sprint, but a marathon. You need to choose a steady pace. Thank you for your offer and we are here for you anytime. Dragon hugs.

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  29. Congratulations to Melissa!
    I'm overly swamped for now, but this sounds like an excellent idea, Al. Maybe after the summer when my schedule should clear up a bit, I could give it a go. I'd hate to commit without being sure I can come through. By the way, this is the kind of things you do that makes you an asset to our community. Very thoughtful. I hope to join up later in the year :)

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    1. Commitment is important and many here believe so. One of the big reasons why they are passing. But my offer stands for as long as the Cave stands so don't worry about it. Thanks for your kind words. You're a sweetheart. Dragon Hugs!

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  30. Congratulations, Melissa!
    As to goals, it's amazing what a good kick in the backside can do. So nice of you to start a 'backside kicking group' (If only you knew how much fun I'm having watching a dragon do this!). I'm not going to jump in quite yet since my own crowd is doing this more than I can handle ;), but I'll definitely keep it in mind in the future - if you're still willing.

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    1. Sure. As I said, my offer stands for as long as the Cave stands. Butt kicking is always fun, that's for sure! Thanks for visiting, Tonya. Dragon Hugs!

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  31. ?Are you still looking for a Dragon Partner?
    I would appreciate someone to kick my butt...and allow me to kick theirs when needed. Mine is in dire need lately.... I am tired of kicking my own butt and your post completely resonates with me.
    Found you by Googling "how to find a goal partner," lol.

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    1. Hi Angeline. Thanks for your visit.
      If you're interested, drop me a note at fatherdragon1@gmail.com and we'll talk. Kicking is sometimes what we need to get things done right, right? :)

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