Stand up for the challenge - Be an Ironman

Two weeks ago Elise Fallson shared this picture on Facebook; Team Hoyt. I told her I had the chance to meet Dick Hoyt in Mexico and promised her I would write about that meeting. Father Dragon doesn't take his word lightly.

For those of you who don't know who Dick and Rick Hoyt are, allow me to introduce them to you.

• The Background

The umbilical cord entangled around Rick's neck deprived his brain from oxygen. Tragedy marked his birth but determination and love would mark the rest of his life. A computer registers his brain impulses so he can communicate with the world. One day, Rick watched an ad about a charity race and told his father he wanted to enter. "Will you enter the race with me?" Dick was not an athlete but he agreed. He pushed Rick's wheel chair but he didn't expect that race to be a life altering experience for both of them.

"It feels like my disability disappears," Rick told his father. "I felt free for the first time. Can we do it again?"

Ever since, Dick and Rick Hoyt are a living example that limitations only exist when the human being decides to accept them. Team Hoyt has entered marathons and triathlons, including the Ironman World Championship in Hawaii.

This is a 2.4 miles swim, 112 miles bike, 26.2 miles run competition. In the words of their organizers: "The Championship centers on the dedication and courage exhibited by participants who demonstrate the IRONMAN mantra that “ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE. ®”/ ....a 140.6-mile journey that presents the ultimate test of body, mind and spirit to earn the title of “IRONMAN.”"

But the trial of body, mind and spirit is not exclusive of the Ironman. Any high performance athlete knows when the body is utterly depleted from energy, the athlete must appeal to what's in his heart and mind to impel himself forward.  He must get strength from other source than the muscles in order to cross the Finish line.

• Congress of Heroes - Mexico City

A Congress of Heroes qualifies as an occasion for a dragon to shift into human. It was a golden chance to learn humanity from a top quality group. Furthermore, it qualified for the impersonation of a reporter. Don't ask me how a Press ID fell in my claws. I'm a dragon. I am supposed to be cunning.

Dick Hoyt's conference was first. A video of Team Hoyt during an Ironman Championship shook the very foundations of every single soul in that room. "It is necessary to train both mind and spirit as hard as the body in order to complete such a competence." The narrator explained. "Those who only train the body find very soon that is not nearly enough."

During the session of questions and answers, I played my part. "Have you ever felt defeated by any obstacle you've met? Ever thought 'this is too much for me. I am not going to make it'?"

"Never." Determination and honesty vibrated in his tone. "We have always crossed the Finish Line in all the races we've entered."

"The video says you must train the body, mind and spirit. Can you tell us what is your mental and spiritual training?"

"I keep my mind focused on my goal. There is no place for defeat.  The words 'I can't' don't exist for me and my family. At first they told me my son was a vegetable. I have never seen a tomato with a college degree before. I don't waste time in doubts, or negativity or the fact some people refuse to accept us. In my mind there is only one phrase; 'Yes, I can.' In my heart there is only one feeling; love."

IRONMAN

• The Obstacles

Yes, videos are touching. However they are but a taste of all the obstacles Dick Hoyt and his family had to overcome in order to get there.

- Dick had to endure people accusing him of "exhibiting, using and abusing" his son, out of some twisted need to get famous. They said he was doing all that, not because Rick asked him, but because Dick needed that attention.

- Many organizing committees of marathons and triathlons refused to allow them to compete. Those which allowed them to compete would only do so if Dick entered in Rick's category. Dick had to join a group much younger than him and meet the minimum speed required for that category. They didn't take into consideration Dick was dealing with the weight of both he and his son or Dick's own age. Every demanded requirement was according to Rick's age and weight, as if he alone were the athlete.

- In the Ironman (and all triathlons)  Dick pulls his son's boat. For this reason and because the boat would mean an obstacle for other competitors, he was required to be among the last to leave the starting line. I must highlight that there is a limit of time for an athlete to reach the subsequent phase, and that limit is set according to the registered age (remember he was competing in a younger -and faster- category?) Well, if the athlete doesn't get to the next phase within the time limit, he is out.

- They didn't just face the opposition of committees and the critic of public opinion. They also had to face the rejection of some of the athletes. Rudeness, mockery and ostracism; father and son tasted them all. They would hear things like "Step aside. Go home. Shame on you, dragging your son like that! What are you doing here? Why are you doing this to him? Give up, old man!"

Dick Hoyt has two mottos: "Yes, you can" and "Don't Run Alone."

• Can

During the first Ironman, the chain ring of his bike broke. Dick managed for someone of his team to bring a replacement but he lost precious time. Besides that, his muscles were getting cold and relaxing. By the time he got the spare, it was very unlikely they would be allowed to continue once they reached the next post for the running part. Dick asked his son what he should do. "I will do whatever you want. If you want to continue, I'll make my best but time is already upon us."

Rick's wish was to continue and so, Dick got on the bike. At first, all his body complained for the renewed effort, but as he warmed up, he found new energy filled his limbs. He arrived last at the next post but was surprised to find he would be allowed to continue. They changed to the wheel chair and he started running. He was behind for many miles. Eventually, he met with the rear of the group and he started passing runners by. Many of those who had mocked them or ignored them were now standing aside to let them pass and they were actually cheering for them.

With renewed enthusiasm, Dick's previous exhaustion was gone and he kept a good pace. Night had fallen upon them and Dick just kept asking his son how he was. Rick would wave his hand in an okay signal. Even though they were last in the group after the incident, delayed for an hour and so and with little chance to make it, they crossed the Finish Line with a 20 minute spare margin. As you can see in the video, Rick is raising his arm in victorious gesture. Dick said he couldn't believe what they had just done.

• Don't Run Alone. You can do it!

When I met Dick Hoyt, he was 67 years old, he still competed in the Ironman, pulling, pushing and carrying his son in his arms. Dick would have never accomplished everything he did in his life, his health and fortitude if his son hadn't been born. He knows it and says his son gave him more than he ever dreamed of.

To me, "Don't run alone" means to look for people to help you make your dream come true.  If you find your impulsing force, it will help you to discover what you're made of, physically, emotionally and spiritually.

"Can" is choosing to open your arms wide to life. Choose to fulfill your dreams, no matter how many voices tell you it's impossible. Don't keep all the good you have inside to yourself. Don't prevent yourself from knowing the heights you can reach. Don't accept the negative critiques. Don't accept doubts and limitations set by others. The only one who gets to say how far you can get is yourself!

I believe the most genuine Ironman Championship for anyone is life itself. Focus your mind in crossing the Finish Line along with your son (which can be that dream you carry in your chest just the same). It doesn't matter if other runners pass you by. It doesn't matter if they look at you with disdain and mockery. It doesn't matter if you're criticized or all odds are against you. You are not running alone.

There are people willing to believe in you, if you let them. Focus your mind and spirit on your goals, on victory. Believe in yourself, believe in others, love your goal, breath it, live it! You will be amazed how many "impossible" things you are capable of achieving.

Thanks for your time and may this bit of wisdom stay with you for a long time.

Losing or being bested. Why is it important to know the difference?

Difference? What difference? The important thing is the outcome. I didn't win.

In fact there is a difference and it is important to the extent of how I handle defeat and my personal development. There will always be someone who is better and someone who is worse than me in any given arena. It is also clear that no matter how hard I try or how good I am at something, I am not all mighty. I have limits. There are things I won't be able to achieve because either I can't or I don't know how to do them. The key factor that decides whether I win or not is my limit. Who sets those limits? Are they fixed by society, by my family, by the Higher Powers or by me?

The Ravens won the Superbowl. I know. What the heck *that* has to do with this? Bear with me for a minute, I beg you. Ravens won. Final score 34-31. The 49ers lost or they were bested? I am 49er hard core fan but I think they wasted the first half of the game. They did terrible errors, gave away yards, lost the ball, etc. At the end of the first half their score was 3. During the second half they were brilliant and boosted their numbers to the final 31. It took Ravens the whole game to reach 34. It took the 49ers half game to jump from 3 to 31.  If they had been brilliant the whole game, would the outcome be different? We will never know, but my guess is yes. So my conclusion is that 49ers were not bested. They lost. They didn't win because they didn't give their best, not because their opponent was beyond their abilities and skills. Done with Superbowl example.

In my very personal opinion there is nothing wrong with being bested. As I said, there will always be someone better or more skilled than you. It's how things are. However, when you don't give your best, it is not your opponent winning over you, it's you defeating yourself. Is there any worse defeat than self-boycott?

I am one of those creatures who strive to be better every day. I am aware of my flaws and I try hard not to hide behind them to justify my defeat with the "I am not good enough" excuse. Am I really  not good enough that I didn't win? Or am I actually scared to get out of my zone of comfort? Am I boycotting myself to have an excuse to stay in this zone?

This is no easy question. More often than not the answer is deep within us, hidden in the darkest corner under other covers. It is quite a task to dig it out so we usually tend to go for the faster "I am not good enough." After all that's a pill that we are already used to take, regardless the painful it might be. Next time you face defeat, ask yourself: "Am I positive beyond doubt this is my best or is it my best within my zone of comfort?"

Not being good enough has not a way out. Fear can be changed and makes success available.

Anyway, the support I need today is specific. I am in bad need of laughter. I will appreciate if you leave me a joke, a link to a funny video, funny tale, funny pic or post. I also take single smiles for all comment! This dragon's most powerful magic works with laughter and I am running out of it.

P.S. I am still very proud the 49ers made it to the Superbowl and I am keeping that satisfaction the whole year.

This post is part of the Insecure Writer's Support Group hosted by amazing Captain Ninja Alex J. Cavanaugh. We post first Wednesday of every month and there is always room for one more! 

Overcoming Adversity, a dragon practice

The Overcoming Adversity bloghop is hosted by Nick Wilford from Scattergun Scribblings. It is part of his campaign for his stepson Andrew, who has cerebral palsy. It's all for a noble cause and there is still time to join.  Please click on the links to learn more about it. Theme is: overcoming adversity for something you believe in.

Art: Ghostwalker2061

Father Dragon and the Dragon Slayer

“The greatest treasure you will ever find is in books,” my Grandfather used to say. “Intellect is more precious than gold.”

My grandfather treasured knowledge. It shaped his personality. He believed in selfless service but not in submission. He was born under adverse circumstances. Raised as an orphan, he suffered of bad health since a hatchling. Wealth knocked at his door two times; the first as a heritage that humans stole from him, the second in the form of corruption. He was too young to fight for the first and too honest to accept the second. He rather worked hard than steal.

“The fact you’re born with disadvantages doesn’t mean you have to resign yourself to a bad life.”

Surrender to adversity was against him. Flaws were challenges and opportunities to show his quality. My Grandfather and I had a common enemy, the Dragon Slayer. That ruthless hunter poisons our bodies and can turn our life into a living hell. He is invisible when he attacks Dragon Fathers and only his opponent can see him. My Grandfather fought the Dragon Slayer first, but he taught me how he did it. He was aware I would become the next Father Dragon and I would face the Dragon Slayer sooner rather than later.

“Don’t be afraid of our enemy. He serves us to prove what we are made of,” Grandpa would tell me. “You and I have Champions’ blood.”

We fought together several times, and often we recovered from our wounds together. His wounds were always the worst but the more they hurt, the louder he sang. He encouraged me to sing along, and he told me jokes to make me laugh.

“If you laugh, it doesn’t hurt that much anymore. It’s when you focus on your wounds that the pain turns into a torment.”

Once I questioned him, rather upset of my mauled condition. “Where do you get strength to laugh at pain?”

 “Listen carefully. When you face adversity, sixty percent of the outcome depends on your attitude. If you accept the victim’s role –Fate’s victim, God’s victim, circumstances’ victim or your enemy’s victim – you will feel trapped and helpless. It will be your doom. But if you think of adversity like a mission appointed to the Ultimate Warrior, you’ll see the challenge but you will also feel empowered with fortitude and resilience meant for heroes. You will become that hero in your heart and you will strive to fulfill your mission, regardless the odds.”

I had the chance to see his words turn into action many times along the years. Doctors were in awe that he got better from conditions that meant death to any other dragon. In the end, it was not the Dragon Slayer that killed him but old age.

The last words of Father Dragon “The Great” to me were a joke. Mine were a vow.

I will never be the Dragon Slayer’s victim, but the hero that will conquer him because I am Father Dragon now.

Striving for Excellence or Addiction to Struggle

Some people love challenges. Some people fear challenges. There are those who are called adrenaline junkies. Whenever I see a guy risking his life in extreme sports I wonder why they do that. I can't help to think they are just suicidal and shake my head at them.

Two days ago my perspective on these people changed. Two days ago I made the decision to participate in the A to Z Challenge. Although I thought it was a great concept and idea, I was also reluctant.

Everything in this world has its counterpart. You know, the Ying and Yang. There is good and there is evil. There is light and there is darkness; Hot and Cold, Firm and Changing, etc. All humans also have their counterparts. Some may realize where they are, some may not but this discovery is each person's job. Dragons don't mess with that (to some extent.) In any case, we also have our counterpart. I call it the Dragon Slayer. He represents all the things that cause me conflict, fear, anger, and more often than not, pain.  The Dragon Slayer and I have fought endless battles against each other for centuries. I have many battle scars to prove it, seen and unseen. The field for excellence where we've fought for years now is my health. Sometimes he wins terrain, sometimes I win. We battle every single day.

Dragon Slayer makes propositions "of peace". If I give up fighting for some things, pain will cease. It's really a ruse. There is always a catch, and the price to pay is higher in the end. My ninja muse is my Lady of War. Her challenges and ideas, although difficult, are always part of a major strategy against the Dragon Slayer. It's like S.E.A.L training. She faces me with my fears, so I attempt to defeat them, control them or solve them. If I do, the Dragon Slayer looses another ace in our war.

That's why I said she laughs at the face of my fear, and I laugh at her laughter. Nevertheless, I am not immune to fear and pain and that's why I hesitate to take up the challenges.

In the A to Z case, the points that drew me back were,

1. It requires commitment. (I don't make plans. How a day comes depends on my war with Dragon Slayer)
2. It requires time. (Same as above. If I am losing a combat, I might not have time.)
3. It requires to write on demand. (I don't know how to call on creativity at will.)
4. Many people will read you. (This is both Yeepiii and Arggh to a dragon secluded from people for  many years. I am only used to dwarves and a selected knights.)

Above all things, I never break my word once I have engaged it. It is a matter of honor. Father Dragons don't take their honor lightly. But as Captain Jack Sparrow said, "The problem is not the problem but your attitude about the problem." In this case, the challenge is not the challenge but the effort that involves for me to enter and do it. I have to manage to stay up of things for a month. Two days ago I was up. Now Dragon Slayer won the upper land. I must regroup and regain my position.

I have signed up on the challenge. My word is engaged and I shall keep it. This is like extreme sports for me. If someone would ask me why I do this to myself, my answer is:

"Because it feels darn good when you conquer and defeat your fears."

So have you signed up for a challenge? Have you found where is your counterpart? Do you need a Dwarf Cheering Squad?