During the vacation of my favorite nephew here at the Cave, I had to sit and watch with him a lot of his favorite shows. One of them is an old, very-low-budget-version of the Muppets show. And when I say low-budget I mean that. Anyway, they introduced the Half-man (a standard action doll that was cut in half.) What called my attention is that this Half man lived in a half constructed house, asked for only half steaks and half salads as meals, drove half a car and wanted to buy just half the pants, half shirt, one sock and one shoe. Whenever people complained about his requests or life style, his answer was "I am the Half Man, and I like things in half."
I laughed and my 5 year old nephew laughed too, because I am his hero (second after his daddy) and he mimics me when we're together. He was clueless that my laughter wasn't about the "funny" sketch. It was my instinctive reaction to express I had just been hit by a brick of realization. A dragon size brick. I have whined a lot about all the things I've left unfinished. Various stories, paintings, sculptures, comic strips, drawings, dreams, efforts, goals, all abandoned halfway because... just because.
Why, in the name of Dragon Ancestors, do I do that? I really don't know. Truth is there is a number of things half made enough to fill... half a living room. Two posts ago, I said I started writing again. It was a short story and I said it was "pouring out of me". Guess what? That's right. It joined the ranks already. It wasn't that I didn't have anything else to write. I had multiple ideas. I just dug my heels in the ground and forced the stop overnight. I also said it was a journey to my inner self. Eventually, I told myself maybe there was no actual need of written records from such a journey. Maybe it wasn't about writing it. It was about living it. Maybe I'll finish it later. Yeah, later. Whenever that later is. Probably after the later that I'll use to finish all the bunch of other half projects awaiting for a time that will never come because, as the Dalai Lama said, there are two days in the year that you can't do anything. One is yesterday, the other is tomorrow. The time to work and live is NOW.
Later is brother of tomorrow on the road to never. Mostly if it doesn't have an exact date to turn into now. Yes, I have a perfect command of theory. Pity it is useless to me as long as I don't figure out why I subconsciously but actively resist to finish things. I would like to believe it is part of being a genius since Leonardo DaVinci did that a lot too, but I'm far from having DaVinci's accomplishments. My finished art (like in properly finished) is so rare that might become precious one day. People might say "Lo and behold! I do have an item Father Dragon actually completed."
Anyway, as long as I don't solve the riddle of why, I'm the Half Dragon and I like things in half.
But I do give my whole heart in Dragon Hugs!
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