Son of the Tough Life /Thorn between two lovers

I already told you about my two muses, the muse of writing -who I call the ninja muse- and the muse of sculpting/painting/drawing/designing -who I don't have to call because she's always there.

If you read already my Statement to Honorable Jury of all Writers, you know why she became a ninja muse and that my relationship with her is a sadomasochist one. She challenges me, I fight her, we argue 90% of the time. She can make me feel less than a lizard or greater than the wisest dragon ever. She doesn't come at my call and I don't listen to her when she wants to talk. The times we coincide and get to talk, we turn conversation into arguments. Heated arguments. She shows me her Muse Wrestling Federation locks like the "Disbrainer" and I prove my "Dragonator" on her.

The problem is I am always thinking on the ninja muse. I love to hate her. I hear her enticing voice in my ears even when she's not around. I am addicted to our fights because they mean exercise for my brain. She has taught me so many things about myself recently. But the biggest problem of all is that she doesn't pay the bills. My personal treasure does.

My other muse adores me. She is always here when I call for her and when I don't call for her she's here too. Her ideas come like a sweet kiss on my brow. She shampoos my mane and massages my head as she talks of projects.

People like my other muse better. I'm not grumpy when I'm around her. I do seem to be at peace. I'm easy going. I don't look like a psycho dragon planning on raiding the whole state -as I look when with the ninja muse. I don't despair. I smile a lot more. More people also like what my sweet muse and I create together. They like it enough to pay for it. This obviously helps my treasure. Doors are opening at us.

Where I come from "Hijo de la Mala Vida" (Son of the Tough Life) is how we call someone who is not happy if he's not in trouble. A person who enjoys problems or always tends to choose the hardest road needlessly. Both my muses are creative, and I am happy creating. I am a creative dragon. I am always threatening my ninja muse to close the Dragon Cave entrance for her, for good. Of course I won't do that. It is part of our Apache love game. For months I have given her my prime time in spite of everything.

Right now my best chances are coming from my loving muse but she demands the obvious: Prime Time. The Ancestors are shining a light upon her but my heart resists even though I know the ninja muse cannot match the opportunities offered. I had told her we can schedule time and still have our full contact fights but she's kind of sad and I also feel bad for us. I am an Hijo de la Mala Vida. I love the muse that mistreats me more than the muse that adores me and yet...

A dragon must do what a dragon must do. That little measuring blue bar on the side might take a bit longer to move. But hey, I am not the only one who has to do this, right?