Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Chronicles of the Dragon Cave from A to Z: "H" is for Horror

   The high vaulted ceilings of the Main Chamber made the random screams reverberate deep into the Quartz Chamber. It is the tenth time those deafening shrieks interrupt my meditation for inner peace. Snorting, I balanced off my tail. How can anyone achieve a decent yoga posture with such wailing?
   "Yes, Sire!" My task-master's immediate arrival made me suspect he was pacing outside my door.
   "I've been listening to this cacophony all morning, how long before it's over?"
   Tassin's eyebrows rose before sinking lower. "Probably a couple of hours."
    I grumbled a curse. "Make sure they don't mess with the Thermal Pool. Last time, I couldn't look at it without feeling nauseous and nobody wanted to clean."
    "Carmelita is in charge now. She's doing a very clean job. It's obvious she's an expert."
Another long high pitched scream reached us from the Main Chamber.
    "This is the last time I allow this.  Next time you need cash and want to do a Hunky Dwarf Calendar, either you choose the hairy style or another depilation center."
    "Yes, Sire. But... if you don't mind, we were wondering if we could sell the calendar here."
    I couldn't help a sarcastic laughter as I resumed my yoga posture. "Everybody knows I don't like horror. I don't buy it and I certainly don't sell it."


  1. Lol, I love the idea of a Hunky Dwarf calendar backfiring! I'm sure a dragon one would be pretty popular though... :D

  2. I don't know if I even want to imagine a Hunky Dwarf calendar. Hmmmm...
    Dani @ Entertaining Interests

  3. Hunky Dwarf calendar would give me nightmares...

  4. I love the idea of the dwarves suffering depilation for their calendar. Funny. Yes, a nice dragon calendar would sell well.


  5. 'Hunky Dwarf' Calendar? There's an oxymoron for you. Ha, ha, ha.

  6. And just how costly will this Hunky Dwarf calendar be. Will I be able to find it on Amazon?

  7. @Happy: And to you too!
    @Nick: And I wouldn't have to depilate, hahaha.
    @Dani: Close your mind to horrific thoughts.
    @Alex: I wouldn't do that to you.
    @Jo: I'm too shy for that, but I'll think about it. :D
    @farawayeyes: Hahaha, you made me go to the dictionary for that one, but yes.
    @C.Lee: I don't know. Let me ask Tassin. They handle their own business.

  8. A dragon doing yoga? Now -that's- a new one. Great story, Al :)

  9. Never liked dwarves no matter hunky or not.

  10. A calendar is a very good idea! Sign me up for one. Front cover could be the dragon downward dog.

  11. I'm picturing a dragon in classic yoga position... trying to wrap my brain around it...
    Writer In Transit

  12. Nobody ever wants to clean over here, either.

  13. What a great little story. Glad I stopped by.

  14. Bwahaha . . .love this post! It made laugh. Thanks!!!

  15. @Mark: I'm learning, don't laugh. :)
    @Regina: They are prettier when in the cheering squad, you'll see.
    @Elizabeth: Hahahaha, you'd be like the only customer. :)
    @michelle: When I master the greeting to the sun, I'll take a pic for you to see it.
    @jaybird: That's the problem with lazy staff, hahaha.
    @Sally: Glad you visited. Thanks!
    @Tyrean: You share my sense of humor. Hahahaha!

  16. Not a big fan of horror either, Al. Scares the daylights out of me! Best of the day to you and wishing you only good things. Must agree with you about rushing your creative artwork - it's like my crochet. If I rush it, the art gets lost in the shuffle and it never turns out as nice as I want it to. Cute pup, btw.:)

  17. Hahaha. Geez, is it so much to ask to just be able to do yoga in peace? Poor Dragon.

  18. lol That was so unexpected. Horror, indeed. Thanks for the laugh, Al. :)

  19. Hahahaha touche. Point goes to the dragon. ;-)

  20. @M.J. I also wish you the best of days. And yes, no creative work must be rushed. :D
    @Julie: My thoughts, exactly, hahaha. But I don't quit!
    @M.Pax: I'm so glad. I still chuckle when I remember.
    @Misha: Thank you, thank you. :)

  21. I love it! You know, the more I read and the more all the surroundings are become clearer in my head! I like your place!

  22. Easily could have been H for Hilarious!

  23. Yoga and horror just dont mix. :D
    Hope you're having a groovy H day!!

    1. If you aren't flexible, yoga IS horror. Happily, I am. But I don't do yoga.

  24. Haha, hunky dwarfs and yoga! Love it! :)

    From A to Z, Kristen's blog: kristenhead.blogspot.com

  25. *LOL* Hunky dwarf calendar. Wow. I shudder!

  26. Is there such a thing as a hunky dwarf?

  27. How hard did you laugh writing this post? Hunky Dwarf Calendar? We don't sell horror here!!!

  28. Hunky Dwarf Calendar... ROFL I can only imagine the music playing during the photo shoots. :-)

  29. @Franny: And that's how the dragon gets to charm people. :)
    @David: That was the idea, hahaha.
    @Pk: I'm still learning. Thanks!
    @Tony: I do agree with you. Not that flexible yet but not scared of pain.
    @Kristen: I'm glad you liked it :D
    @Christine: I told him it was a bad idea.
    @L.Diane: Mmmh, I think so, but only heard of such in The Hobbit movie about Thorin.
    @Robin: Honestly? A lot!
    @Jeff: HAHAHAHAHA. You do? It seemed to me I heard the tunes of "Too sexy for this dragon"

  30. Oh, father Dtagon... I am so impressed that you keep fit with Yoga.nothing worse than a stiff or inflexible dragon.... Am I right?

    Here's to a better hair removal system to give you your much needed peace.

  31. Hunky, hairy dwarf. Oh, the horror! :) Excellent bits here and quite the visual stuck in my head now.

  32. lol!! Thanks for the chuckle!! So funny.
    So, where can I buy the calendar? ;)

  33. You outdid yourself with this scene. You just don't know where my head was going with this! Great fun.

  34. Ha ha. Funny piece.

  35. This was so much fun! What a clever ending!


  36. Wednesday April 10th, 2013
    Hi Al - er - Father Dragon,
    It took me a while to find your blog, but here I am! Thanks for visiting my H-post. Since you were the very first commenter, you get an extra link!
    Best wishes,