Insecure Writer’s Support Group is the brainchild of Alex J. Cavanaugh. It's the first Wednesday of the month, so it's time to express our fears or offer encouragement to others. If you’d like to join, click on the link to sign up.
Thanks to the kind co-hosts, Laura at My Baffling Brain, Mark Koopmans, Shah Wharton, and Sheena-Kay Graham.
Today marks three years since the very first IWSG post. Next month marks one year since the IWSG site and Facebook group opened and there is great news for all the IWSG members. You can check here on either Alex's or the IWSG site (links above.)
I usually get my post ready a day earlier. Today I'm late in my own standards. I was uncertain whether to be on the insecure side or on the cheering one. I do have insecurities but all my complaints look so insignificant and silly these days. I've been surrounded by the presence of death. Before Tina Downey's passing, I heard about the cousin of a friend who was killed in a car crash. Next Sunday, I had breakfast with the news of Tina's passing and dinner with the news of my beloved uncle's passing. On Friday, another friend lost her father.
They were all different people in regards of their personality. Their deaths were in different circumstances and they were received in different ways. While some, like Tina and my uncle, cast light during their lifetime, others caused only trouble and wasted their life away.
I can't help to think on my own life. What I've done for myself and for others. Do the things I worry or complain about really matter at all or is it just a waste of time? Most of my insecurities are based on past experiences. Logic tells me that giving them the power to impair my growth means I live in the past. And he who lives in the past, waste his present and has no future.
A wise man told me once that people usually live crying the past and worrying to death about the future. "With one foot on the past and the other foot on the future, we pee on the present", he said. I can't help to think insecurities are born from the past and torture us about the future, therefore we miss the invaluable gift of the here and now. It is normal to have fears and traumas, it's normal to complain, it's normal to worry about what will come. Yet, the fact that it is normal doesn't make it automatically right or the best option.
So many times we have been told the present is a gift. Live in the here and the now. Do now what you plan to do tomorrow. There is no tomorrow. So many times we have been repeated to let go of the past. History cannot be changed. You can only learn from it and keep going. Past wounds are only useless burdens. Change, learn, open your eyes to the treasure you have now. And we keep nodding in agreement and vowing we will start doing this...tomorrow.
Why is it that hard to start embracing the gift of life now? What is wrong with today that so many of us make our best to escape from it? Wouldn't it be better to strive to make our best of the present, and if we don't like it, start to change it? Wouldn't it be worse to meet our final hour with the regret that we never took the time to actually live this life because we were extremely busy, either fearing it or complaining about it?
Dragon Hugs!
I don't want to pee on today!
ReplyDeleteSorry you were hit with so much loss at once. It does remind us that life is precious and we need to live - now.
As death is a part of life, so too is one's passing a chance of reflection for those left behind. Sorry for your loss, Sir Dragon. Living in the now is like getting a new present each day,
ReplyDeleteWhile alive, sir, while alive. :)
Yep. While alive. Human hugs all around!
DeleteI agree that life is a gift, and we should be grateful for every minute we get to spend with friends and family. I'm sorry for your losses. Why does it always seem like death always hits in one giant wave? This week- for me- was very similar to yours, a friend's mother passed, another's niece and nephew both perished in a terrible car accident leaving behind an orphaned infant and then I found out about Tina's passing. Although I did not know her, I felt the deep impact of hearing about yet another death in such a short period of time. It definitely brought me to a place of reflection and revelation about my own life and how I choose to live it, in the future.
ReplyDeleteAmen. It's hard to lose people. It's even harder when it seems so wrong. In the town next to mine, a young man stopped to help a lady change her flat tire and was killed by a hit and run driver. That doesn't fit the paradigm. That's not fair. But as moms all over the globe say, life isn't fair. It's not meant to be fair. we asked for choice and we got it. And that means we have to make the choice of how we approach life. I sometimes get caught up in the ghosts of the past and the worries for the future, but I am lucky enough to be surrounded by the very best of friends who have wreak of wisdom and help keep me focused. You're a very wise dragon. Thanks for the reminder not to pee on the now.
ReplyDeleteDwelling on the past only robs us of tomorrow. And today.
ReplyDeleteJust don't eat the yellow snow if you do pee on today.
Living in the present is a struggle. I battle it daily. This whole thing is a sobering topic, but I did laugh at 'pee on the present.' I'll have to keep that in mind. ;)
ReplyDeleteIWSG #179 until Alex culls the list again.
Draconic wisdom. As ever. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear of your losses, especially being all at once. But I am glad for this post, that they inspired. It's too easy to forget to live in the here and now. The reminder does good to the soul.
ReplyDeleteAs always, a moving post that speaks to the heart. I think the day to day also inhibits us sometimes because we become used to the slow movement of time and it's hard to retain joy and bubbles when each day is more or less the same. But I agree with you. The present is a gift. I want to honor that sentiment and love my life as I live it. It's a goal and a journey.
ReplyDeleteSorry for your losses--that's a lot to bear all at once.
ReplyDelete(((hugs)))
Thank you for such a precious post. Poor health, a hectic life, and being a totally disorganized dumb blonde has kept me away for so long, but for some reason today I felt the urge to come by here and I am so glad. I have tried to live my life with 'no regrets' and of course, there have been a few, but I work hard to keep it at a few and small ones at that. Life is too short to spend it looking into the past.
ReplyDeleteIt is hard to lose those that are close to us, but for them, their passing is just the next adventure. I try my best to rejoice in their good fortune to be onto another great experience.
Hi Al - I too have heard other stories .. death and serious illness .. we seem to move in these circles and I guess life has never in fact changed - we just have the luxury today of getting our lazy brains to realise such things and comply ... we need to share our lives, to care and be compassionate ... and we are in desperate times ..
ReplyDeleteI feel for you friends and families ... with thoughts - Hilary
None of us know what tomorrow holds, let's all do our best to live in the present rather than 'pee in it.' I'm sure I will remember that saying.
ReplyDelete"And he who lives in the past, waste his present and has no future." That's a great quote Al.
ReplyDeleteBig Hugs Back! The present is definitely a gift of life!
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking the very same things thousands of times, but unfortunately I keep doing the same mistake. I live in the past more often than not and I'm scared of the future in a way! I know I shouldn't do that and I promise I'd start to think differently from the following day, but somehow the following day never arrives! Bear hugs for you!
ReplyDeleteI think it'd be very awkward for me to pee on the present. So sorry to hear you're surrounded by death, but you've got a great positive attitude about embracing today. Now is the time to live!
ReplyDeleteThanks Al for the Dragon Hug! It's warm and fuzzy. Definitely warm. Probably because it comes from a dragon.
ReplyDeleteYeah, let's not be hesitant to embrace life now. Translation: love people where they're at and forgive their trespasses. Life is far too short to live any other way. Let's make a difference and help the world be a little better place to live in.